hughbiquitous

Authentic relationships happen in the margins of life. Most folks these days have no margin. Therefore, most folks have no authentic relationships.

Too bad Jesus never said, “Blessed are the poor in margin…”

This showed up on Drudge this morning. Part of me already knew this. Another part of me is stung by it.

A quarter of Americans say they have no one with whom they can discuss personal troubles, more than double the number who were similarly isolated in 1985. Overall, the number of people Americans have in their closest circle of confidants has dropped from around three to about two.

The comprehensive new study paints a sobering picture of an increasingly fragmented America, where intimate social ties — once seen as an integral part of daily life and associated with a host of psychological and civic benefits — are shrinking or nonexistent. In bad times, far more people appear to suffer alone.

…”We know these close ties are what people depend on in bad times,” [Lynn Smith-Lovin, a Duke University sociologist] said. “We’re not saying people are completely isolated. They may have 600 friends on Facebook.com [a popular networking Web site] and e-mail 25 people a day, but they are not discussing matters that are personally important.”

…Whereas nearly three-quarters of people in 1985 reported they had a friend in whom they could confide, only half in 2004 said they could count on such support. The number of people who said they counted a neighbor as a confidant dropped by more than half, from about 19 percent to about 8 percent.

…Smith-Lovin said increased professional responsibilities, including working two or more jobs to make ends meet, and long commutes leave many people too exhausted to seek social — as well as family — connections: “Maybe sitting around watching ‘Desperate Housewives’ . . . is what counts for family interaction.”

Robert D. Putnam, a professor of public policy at Harvard and the author of “Bowling Alone,” a book about increasing social isolation in the United States, … has estimated that every 10-minute increase in commutes makes it 10 percent less likely that people will establish and maintain close social ties.

Social Isolation Growing in U.S., Study Says

I led with margin, but there’s more than just margin in play. Trust is a big factor. You can have margin coming out your ears, but if you don’t (or can’t) trust the people around you, you’re little better off than a guy stranded alone on a desert island.

Note to Christ’s church (myself included): you know what it means to trust Someone who’s trustworthy. To be able to trust Christ is a gift of God’s grace. Let God’s grace to you become God’s grace to those around you: be trustworthy yourself, and in so doing, bear witness to the trustworthiness of Christ.